Ron Schneider : Kodak

How "One Little Spark" nearly fried the Dreamfinder

Ron Schneider — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 01:00:00 GMT

As a kid I'd tune in the Wonderful World of Color every Sunday night. Most of the time Walt would introduce some western or historic feature - or some story like "Melvin, the Manic Marmoset" - and I'd switch over to watch Ed Sullivan. He had ventriloquists!

On a good week, there'd be an animated feature or a look behind-the-scenes at the studio, and I'd settle in and soak it up.

But once in a while it'd be a feature about Disneyland and WED Enterprises and I'd be glued to the screen for the next sixty minutes. Nothing seemed as cool to me as watching Walt walk through an attraction-in-the-works, sharing his vision and letting me in on his future plans...

Shortly after EPCOT Center opens in '82, I get a call from the Marketing Division about that year's "Walt Disney World Very Merry Christmas Parade" telecast. Since the Journey Into Imagination opening will be the next big event at WDW, a preview of the ride will be produced, featuring a tour of the building conducted by Dreamfinder.

The Walt Disney Company wants me to walk through my attraction-in-the-works, sharing their vision and letting kids across America in on our future plans.

Everyone's gathered for a late night shoot in the Dreamport, the room where sparks of inspiration are stored. There are huge colorful props on all sides, opening and closing and spinning and rocking in place. In the center of the room are several large spark jars, 4 to 5 feet tall, with bolts of lightning zapping back and forth inside. As the Dreamfinder, I'm going to walk through the middle of this scene, talking straight into the camera about the ride and the new pavilion.

The crew finishes setting up the lights and camera, as a sound man puts a transmitter on my belt with a wire that runs under my costume to a microphone clipped to my vest. After a sound check, I take my place by the Imaginometer and we start a run-through.

Looking straight into the camera, I think about the way Walt hosted his tours of WED. Everything's going smoothly, the cameraman following me as I walk along the ride track. The director is impressed by the way I adapt to my new role; he doesn't know I've been rehearsing for this part all my life. It's another dream come true - until a sharp electrical charge starts drilling right into the middle of my chest.

I stop cold and tell everyone I'm in pain! Looking down, I see a steady electrical spark running from the microphone straight through my shirt and into my chest. In a flash I realize the pain started as I stepped up next to the first spark jar. I quickly move away and the pain stops.

Displaying the intelligence of a Homer Simpson, I try approaching the spark jar again. Same result.

After a brief discussion, it's decided that my distress is caused by a field of static electricity around the spark generator. The sound man produces a large block of thick foam. He carves a divot in the foam, duct tapes it to my chest and puts the microphone in the divot. On my next timid pass by the spark jar, I feel no ill effect.

The rest of the shoot goes off without a hitch, and for the first time I'm actually pleased with the way Dreamfinder looks and sounds on TV. Ah, but there's more to the story ...

Two months later, early on a Sunday morning, I wake up and turn on my bedroom TV. Since there's nothing else on I wind up watching a live broadcast from the Orlando Science Center. It's an educational program, featuring scientific demonstrations performed before students from the 2nd and 3rd grades.

Today's topic is: static electricity.

On a long table they've set up a Van de Graaf generator and a Jacob's ladder. There are balloons and carpet samples and a Happy Host and a Scientist. And a lucky volunteer ... a little seven-year-old girl with short blond hair and a big smile on her face and a small microphone clipped to the front of her dress.

I sit up in bed and (I'm ashamed to admit) start to giggle.

The scientist is speaking. "Now Betsy, this generator produces a harmless electrical charge. Just like the static created when I rubbed the balloon with that flannel cloth. After I start the motor, I'll ask you to touch the silver ball and the charge will go harmlessly through you and cause your lovely blond hair to stand straight up. Are you ready?"

Photo courtesy of AMSE

Betsy is a little skeptical, but she smiles and says, "Yes, I'm ready." I'm shaking my head at this point, and paging through the phone book looking for the number of the Science Center - certain that I'm the only person tuned in who knows what's about to happen.

Mr. Scientist throws the switch, and we hear the generator powering up just as Betsy's smile disappears. The camera shows the excited reaction of Betsy's classmates to the sound of the generator. Teachers are smiling, Happy Host stands by looking very interested. Cut to Betsy. She's staring straight out with a pained and panicked look on her face that no one seems to notice. Betsy looks imploringly up at Mr. Scientist who calmly tells her, "Now touch the metal ball just there and watch what happens ... "

I can only imagine what's going through Betsy's mind. But I know damn well what's going through Betsy's chest.

I never do make it to the phone; I'm spellbound by the look on Betsy's face. But she's a trouper. She touches the globe and her hair stands straight up. But strangely, when Happy Host holds up a mirror so she can see the effect, she doesn't even glance at the image.

In the years since, I've often said that the thing I miss most about my years as Dreamfinder is the look on the kids' faces. Of all those faces, you can bet I'll never forget Poor Distressed Betsy's.

Speaking of things that you shouldn't forget ... Ron Schneider's memoirs, "Themes, Dreams & Schemes: 40 Years Behind a Nametag," should be showing up in a bookstore near you sometime in late 2008 / early 2009. Make plans now to pick up a copy

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M-I-C ... as in "I wish that this microphone would work properly"

Ron Schneider — Thu, 01 May 2008 01:00:00 GMT

Now THAT'S Dedication...

Shortly after Disneyland opened in 1955, someone found an unpaid bill in a desk drawer amounting to thousands of dollars. When Walt heard about it, he is supposed to have said, “Well, when you do big things, you make big mistakes.“ Here's another example of this phenomenon, from my own experience...

When I was recording the Dreamfinder's voice for EPCOT's Skyleidoscope Lagoon Show, I took the opportunity to goof around with show director Gary Paben, trying different voices and doing bits of other ride narrations. And (as I had hoped) it made an impression ... enough so that I started getting calls to do other voices and park announcements.

Michael Eisner, Bob Hope and Mickey & Minnie escort Disney-MGM's "first family"
down Hollywood Boulevard on May 1, 1989. Copyright Disney. All Rights Reserved

One job I was honored to get was as Official Announcer for the Grand Opening of Disney-MGM Studios in 1989. All the “Ladies & Gentlemen, Boys & Girls ... “ things, and the “Please welcome the Chairman of the Board of the Walt Disney Company, Michael Eisner!” stuff. All of this we pre-recorded, but there was one section that had to be done live "The-Morning-Of."

Dozens of TV & movie stars from Hollywood history have been invited to attend the event and walk across the stage – smiling and waving – during the festivities. They have to be introduced, of course ... But since we won't know until that morning who actually shows up, I have to be there live-and-in-person to announce their names.

The view up Hollywood Boulevard ... Before someone in Marketing decided to
place a giant hat in front of the Chinese Theater.
Copyright 1989 Disney. All Rights Reserved

Rehearsals for the dedication ceremony start at 4 a.m. in front of the Chinese Theater. I have a long list of celebrity names and at the appropriate moment I run down the list, sounding properly impressed and impressive.

“Bob Hope ... Ernest Borgnine ... Don Knotts ... Morey Amsterdam ... Rose Marie ... Stan Freberg ... Regis Philbin ... Richard Dawson ... “

The run-thrus go beautifully, and we are about to lock everything down until show time, when I turn to Mr. Paben and say, “This mike I'm using is going to be live when it comes time for my announcement ... Right?”

“Of course it will,” says Gary. “Why wouldn't it be?”

So I tell him this story ...

On an April morning in 1983, Figment & I are nervously poised to dedicate Kodak's Journey Into Imagination in front of the national press and all the top Disney and Kodak executives. It's a musical spectacular featuring characters from Disney parades and the Dapper Dans and dancers and fireworks and right in the middle of it all -- making our official debut -- Dreamfinder & Figment.

Bette Midler & Kevin Costner take part in a group handprint ceremony as part of
the studio theme park's opening festivities. In the back row is (L to R) Audrey
Hepburn, Cicely Tyson, Betty White and Lauren Bacall.
Copyright 1989 Disney. All Rights Reserved

Our part has a musical track that runs under it on which Figment's dialogue has been prerecorded by the purple dragon's official voice, Billy Barty. Everything's timed so that – just as I invite everyone to join us on the ride -- Figment will interrupt me. Then together we will sing our theme song, "One Little Spark."

I'm delivering my lines – timing them to the prerecorded track -- and at the moment he's supposed to speak up Figment opens his yap and nothing comes out. The music continues under, so I know the track is running. But the lizard just smiles at me while I stand there fishing for something to say.

Then, suddenly, he speaks up! I know immediately that someone in the sound booth had the volume turned down on Figment's voice track and I am mildly perturbed. After the event I inquire as to who the 'someone' had been. They wouldn't tell me that day, and I'm still wondering ...

Ron's good close friend, the Dreamfinder, introduces some EPCOT Center visitors to Figment

“So, “ I told Mr. Paben, ”I just want to know that this mike WILL be live when it's time for me to read this list of names.” Seeing my concern, Gary tells the Stage Manager to make doubly sure my mike is hot at the important moment.

Which, of course, it isn't.

So when Bob Hope starts across the stage I announce “Mister Bob Hope !” ... But no one hears it. I can tell it's not going out over the speakers. But it's not my job to fix it, it's my job to read the list. So the stars keep walking across the stage and I keep reading – to no one in particular.

After a moment Gary Paben leaps into the booth, tells the Stage Manager, “His mike is off!” and tells me, “Start again!”

So I announce, “Mister Bob Hope !” as Morey Amsterdam steps onstage. Still no sound. They keep walking across and I keep reading and Gary says, “Fix his mike !” and “Start again !” and I announce “Mister Bob Hope !” as Rose Marie steps onstage and Gary says, “Turn it up !” and “Start again !” and Regis Philbin steps onstage as my voice comes blasting out over the speakers -- “MISTER BOB HOPE!”

Regis shoots me a look of utter disbelief as he steps off stage to the cheers of hundreds of confused Disney Guests. And after the show I tell Gary, “Well, when you do big things ... “

Speaking of big things ... Big things are expected of Ron Schneider's memoirs, "Themes, Dreams & Schemes: 40 Years Behind a Nametag." Which should show up in a bookstore near you sometime in late 2008 / early 2009.

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