Cheryl O. writes in to say:
Jim —
I feel that I’m speaking for a lot of JHM readers out there when I say: Enough with the “Cars” and the “Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest” stories already!
Don’t get me wrong. I understand what you’ve been trying to say with all these
articles on your site lately. That expectations were particularly high for these two projects and that a lot of the Mouse’s money was on the line. I really get the point that you’ve been trying to make.
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But — to be honest — stories about the financial side of things at the Walt Disney Company don’t interest me all that much. Once or twice a month, I’d be willing to read an article like that. But not week after week after week …
Please, Jim. I don’t come to JHM because I’m looking for charts that compare film grosses. I come here because you’re a gifted storyteller who knows a hell of a lot about Disney history. And it’s those sorts of the stories — the ones that talk about attractions that were never built or sequences that were cut out of animated films — that I think your site has been missing these past few months.
So can you please cut back on all the “Cars” & “Dead Man’s Chest” stuff? Post fewer stories that mention Michael Bay in favor of more articles that talk about Discovery Bay? I’m asking nice here.
Your somewhat frustrated fan,
Cheryl O.
Dear Cheryl O. —
Thanks for your very nice note. Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve literally received dozens of e-mails like this. Each of them from loyal longtime JHM fans who have been urging me to cut back on the number of business-related stories that I’ve been posting on this site in favor of more articles about Disney’s theme parks & feature length cartoons.
But here’s the thing, guys. Since I’ve begun writing stories like last week’s “What’s the real final price tag for ‘Dead Man’s Chest’ ” story, we’ve seen a significant spike in traffic for JHM. So much so … Well, that’s the real reason that this site was “off the air” this past Wednesday morning. So many people have been coming by JHM lately that we were actually forced to move from a shared server to a semi-dedicated server in order to better handle our traffic load. (That’s a rather sounding odd name, don’t you think? “Semi-dedicated server”? It sort of reminds me of “semi-boneless ham.” Anyway … )
Soooo … Given that I’d really like this site to hang onto all of these new eyeballs, Cheryl O., I’m afraid that JHM is going to continue to post business-related pieces about the Walt Disney Company. Though — from here on in — I’ll make an effort to confine these sort of stories to just a single day. Most likely on Monday as part of my “MouseWatch” column. If that would be okay with you folks.
As for the rest of the week … Well, we’ll try & strike a balance between what the site’s newer readers are now looking for and the sorts of stories that JHM’s longtime fans are wanting to read.
Speaking of which: In your e-mail, you said that you wanted to learn more about Discovery Bay (I.E. That long-in-development expansion area for Disneyland that never quite made it off of the drawing boards). Well, how’d you like to read a ride description for an attraction that was originally proposed for this part of the park back in 1976?
Yep. We’re about to take a trip back through time to almost 30 years ago. Where — appropriately enough — we’ll then learn about the “Voyage Through Time” ride that the Imagineers wanted to build in the ” … far North Corner of Discovery Bay.”
Photo by Jim Hill
What follows is a transcript of the original WED memo that describes this proposed attraction:
A Voyage Through Time
October 12, 1976
This is a water ride similar to “Pirates of the Caribbean,” with the exception that it remains all on one level, and it is almost entirely an indoor ride.
Each boat seats 20. They resemble a jungle river steam launch (as we will be cruising thru some prehistoric tropical areas) and are fitted with some simple Victorian-motif gadgetry.
These gadgets, we are told, are activated by a huge Time-Transportation Archway that each craft passes under — thus we are “energized” and retained in every time-field we are thrust into. (Vibration motors could be used for each “time period transference.”)
STORY:
Stationed in the far North Corner of Discovery Bay, developed by some of Captain Nemo’s scientists, is an experimental Voyage Through Time trip, recently open to the public (although, we are warned, some of the earlier models were lost way back in the age of the first amphibians, etc.). The loading area is outdoors, and much of this time-travel theory, evolutionary tables, charts, etc. could explain to the holding lines just what they’re in for.
The load area for “Voyage Through Time” is located
above the train to the right. The two blurry light-blue
objects are boats getting ready to head out for a
trip to the distant past (Photo by Jim Hill)
Our trip starts out, simply enough, through a rocky area, occasionally marked with thick jungle growth, dotted here and there with some of Captain Nemo’s lab buildings and machinery. We then come upon one of the immense magnetic field archways, our boat passes under and we are “energized” to travel backwards through time.
(This archway and rockwork actually disguises the building we are cruising into — perhaps some projections or a strobe-light sjow, combined with the vibrations felt under our seats are the first effects we experience as our trip thru time commences.)
Following this “Light Show,” the first era we see is the Age of Mammals (during the presence of, or before the Dawn of Man). The vistas are almost pastoral, as in a museum diorama and a minimal amount of animation should be involved for these scenes.
We cruise on into a storm, the sky darkens, lightning is seen. All of this is soon coupled with a raging volcano which has set off a prairie fire. It is suddenly advised (over the loudspeaker) that we’d better transport ourselves into another time period before we are wiped out. Fortunately, ahead of us looms our escape — another Time-Transportation Archway — and we are hurled once again into a “Light Show” as our boat vibrates.
We are now at the Age of the Dinosaurs — some appear peaceful enough. Others would be terrifying. An enormous Tryannosaurus would be leaning over trying to snap at our boat.
Copyright 1976 Walt Disney Productions
Another Tryannosaur would be in the grips of an immense snake — both grappling over a low gully. Our boat passes safely underneath.
At this stage, we should be moving into an earlier period of the Dinosaurs. Instead of moving under another “Time Arch,” we could perhaps see the scenery hazy, obscure. A few light flashes are observed, coupled with the vibration of the boat. Here we see prehistoric animals less aggressive but nonetheless menacing. As in the Age of Mammals seen before, the vistas are peaceful. A few Stegasaurs (plated Lizards) could be roaming thru a meadow while on the other side of the river some Ceratosaurs (horned dinosaurs) roar and threaten.
There is now more jungle growth, the area appears more swampy. An enormous Brontosaurus is in the same lagoon with us and we hope to pass him unnoticed. Just as we think we’re safe, the creature begins to drift after us. Our only hope is to arrive under the next transporter archway dead ahead before he overtakes us.
We get there just in time (another monster just happens to be at the foot of the Gateway, giving us one last scare), but then something goes wrong: Our time transporter device is locaked into super overdrive (or whatever) and we are hurked into dimensional voids never experienced by human beings anywhere before. (Here we get fancy with the light shows).
Even the voice over the speaker is unsure whether or not we are being transported into the continuing past or the far future.
When we arrive, our boat drifts by some futuristic-looking civilization, with the exception that it is presently in ruins. Over the speaker, we hear: “Who could have been here before the Age of the Dinosaurs — or, could we have gone so far back in time that we have actually arrived in the future and now passed it?”
At the corner of the ruins, an ancient machine is still functioning — possibly some sort of an Atomic Fusion Laser Weapon. At any rate, it appears to have shorted out and is now firing at us in static bursts.
One of the shots finds its mark (our boat, to be exact). All of lights and Victorian gadgetry begin to flicker and glow and we are thrust back into the final time span — in this case, all the way back (or ahead) to our present day. Our announcer wonders if we ever went into the past at all — or instead, beyond the far-flung future.
The mind boggles as we tear out another “E” coupon.
Copyright 1976 Walt Disney Productions
Anywho … I hope that the above transcript was more to your liking, Cheryl O. The sort of story that you’ve been looking for lately on JHM but haven’t seen for a while.
Mind you, as I mentioned earlier, we’re still going to do business-related stories about the Walt Disney Company here on JHM. But — from here on in — I’ll make an effort to confine those sorts of features to a single day. Mostly likely on Monday as part of my weekly “MouseWatch” feature. Soooo … If you really don’t like reading about film grosses or stuff like that, maybe you should wait to come by the site ’til Tuesday morning.
Anyhow … You folks have a great weekend, okay? Hopefully, we’ll see you all again on Monday morning. Or — at the very least — on Tuesday.
‘Til then, you folks take care, okay?
j